Symptoms of Low Self-Esteem:
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Those who suffer from low self-esteem experience:

1. Fear and Anxiety—They are extremely anxious and lack confidence in nearly all new situations where they don't know what is expected of them. They are reluctant to share their opinions especially if they see them as potentially controversial; they may be defensive, and will anticipate rejection, disapproval, failure, criticism, and fearful of making a fool of themselves, abandonment, and intimacy. They fear taking risks, losing what they have, or what have accomplished and the reoccurrence of a self-esteem attack.

2. Self-Esteem Attacks— Often mistakenly called panic attacks, Self-Esteem attacks often lead to depression, self-loathing, and devastation. Such attacks occur when a person feels he or she has done or said something inappropriate, insensitive, stupid, or ridiculous. At the time of an attack, a person's face likely turns red, his heart races, he wishes to escape or evaporate, he feels ashamed, humiliated, devastated, even despairing. Such attacks may last for minutes, hours, or days.

3. Self-Sabotaging— They repeatedly act in ways that are not in their own best interest and fall into three categories: the Floaters, the Needy, and the Workaholics.

4. Depression— Depression in many people is actually a symptom of low self-esteem, not the other way around, as our diagnostic manual would have us believe. It is not unusual for those who suffer from LSE to suffer from situational depression to differing degrees.

5. Hypervigilance— They watch others for clues on how to act, what to wear, what to say and what to do. They also watch the reaction of others, frequently misinterpreting what they see or hear.

6. Hypersensitivity— Overly sensitive, they frequently get their feelings hurt, are easily offended, are quick to become angry or defensive, are easily provoked. They tend to be overly self-focused and can appear insensitive to the feelings of others or can inaccurately look as though they are narcissistic.

7. Storytelling— Those with LSE unwittingly make up stories in their minds about the behavior, motivation, and intent of others--what others are thinking, what others are feeling, what is really meant by the behavior of others, what is really meant by the words of others, without first checking out their perceptions. In this way, they negatively personalize what others do and believe it to be true. This process of cognitive distortion is present to some degree in all LSE sufferers causing them to act inconsistently and/or irrationally and to feel confused about who and when to trust.

8. Projection— Part of what goes into storytelling is that of unconsciously projecting on to others the person's own worst fears. For instance a person who thinks he might fail interprets any criticism as proof that it is happening. A person who thinks he is unworthy and likely to be rejected sees rejection where none is intended. A person who fears being alone, concludes that his partner's moodiness indicates that he or she is about to leave the relationship.

9. Low Self-Esteem can and often is misdiagnosed as a personality disorder, as narcissism, as ADD, as merely an anxiety disorder, or is often overlooked in as the cause of eating disorders. If therapists were educated in the real causes, symptoms, and other aspects of LSE they would readily recognize that LSE is the core issue of most of their clients.

10. Overly Critical— Unknowingly, they tend to be overly critical of themselves and others. This stems from the negative cognitive filter that they have developed and through which all information is sifted. They are unaware that they are more critical than others.

11. Unreasonable Expectations-With unreasonably high or low expectations of others, some expect too much and are often disappointed or angry; others expect too little and relinquish their hope for a brighter future.

12. Poor Relationship and Social Skills— Having avoided social situations they have reduced the opportunity that others have to practice these skills, or to be confident enough to relax and be themselves. Also because those with LSE tend to be suspicious and distrusting of the behavior of others they tend to be react in ways that confuses and alienates the significant people in their lives.

13. Poor Boundaries— They tolerate inappropriate behavior, they may act out with abusive, insensitive or demanding behavior themselves; they may not respect the space, differing interests, or individual needs of others and can be controlling or can smother their significant others.

Click here for more information concerning the Symptoms of Low Self-Esteem.

Signs of Confidence & Healthy Self-Esteem:

Looks ahead, setting both long range and short range goals
Establishes goals that are reasonable and likely attainable
Doesn't procrastinate/is not a perfectionist/is a self-starter
Accepts his/her own weaknesses and lack of skills
Is highly motivated and determined to succeed
Bounces back after a setback, moving forward again
Trusts own ideas, perceptions, and opinions
Has the courage to say what he/she truly feels and believes
Is able to hear and benefit from constructive criticism
Can make timely decisions after considering the options
Displays good social skills
Has a history of far more successes than failures in meeting goals
keeps moving to achieve goals in difficult times.
Is open to both positive and negative feedback
Learns from past mistakes rather than repeating them.
Is willing and able to takes risks
Is willing to cut his/her losses when a project seems doomed to fail
Can change course when it is necessary to do so
Is generally positive, energetic, and assertive
Takes people at their word unless or until there is reason to do otherwise

	Are you suffering from low self-esteem? Take the Sorensen Self-Esteem Test and find your score!
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THE TRUTH ABOUT LOW SELF-ESTEEM

Low self-esteem is actually a thinking disorder in which an individual views himself as inadequate, unworthy, unlovable, and/or incompetent. Once formed, this negative view of self permeates every thought, producing faulty assumptions and ongoing self-defeating behavior.


Low self-esteem should be included in the diagnostic manual (that is utilized by all therapists to determine diagnoses). Instead, it is frequently mentioned as a symptom of many other disorders, which is backwards: low self-esteem (LSE) is the disorder, not merely the symptom.


Low self-esteem always forms in childhood, when an individual is developing his initial view of himself and his attributes. Once formed, LSE cannot be overcome without going through a recovery process.


A person cannot merely "raise" one's low self-esteem and transform it into healthy self-esteem. Instead a person has to learn to alter his basic view of self and transform his thinking and attitudes, which is not a simple process or a quick fix.


Low self-esteem is a serious disorder that affects millions of people--both men and women--destroying their relationships, paralyzing them with fear, and creating lives that will never reach their full potential, leaving them off balance, needy, and unfulfilled.


Unfortunately, like the general public, most therapists are misinformed about low self-esteem and it's consequences and therefore, don't know how to treat it. Many people go to therapy for this issue and leave feeling hopeless about their lives and disillusioned about therapy.

Once low self-esteem is formed, it can only be overcome through a process of recovery. Dr. Sorensen has developed the only known program to do that--one that is extremely effective and is spelled out through the three books above.

Dr. Sorensen has made it her life's goal to observe and study low self-esteem. As a result, she has been able to recognize the causes, the symptoms, and the self-defeating patterns common to all LSE sufferers.

Reading her books will enable you to understand:

• How and when low self-esteem develops
• The specific symptoms that accompany low self-esteem
• The wholly misunderstood "self-esteem attacks"
• The depth of fear and anxiety that LSE sufferers experience
• The patterns of self-defeating behavior that accompany LSE
• The devastatingly emotional turmoil caused by LSE
• The negative and irrational thinking patterns of those who have LSE
• The ways in which LSE creates chaos in--and even destroys--relationships
• The overall severity of LSE and how it stifles creativity, curtails ambition, kills dreams, and often promotes a sense of hopelessness and helplessness

Self-Esteem, Misunderstood and Trivialized by Society

If you suffer from LSE you have likely felt embarrassment due to the negative way in which others have responded to behaviors that result from your LSE. You may have heard such comments as "Just get over it" or "You're just too sensitive," comments that show the misunderstanding of society about LSE. The truth is that those who have low self-esteem didn't cause it, don't want to have it, but are powerless to change how they feel without going through a process of recovery. Unfortunately, this is not widely understood. To understand how society trivializes low self-esteem, we suggest you read Low Self-Esteem Misunderstood and Misdiagnosed.

The Impact of Low Self-Esteem In an Individual's Personal Life

Low Self-Esteem (LSE) is a contributing factor in most cases involving: eating disorders domestic, teen, and gang violence addictive behaviors relationship problems child abuse social anxiety disorders communication problems sexual dysfunction sexual promiscuity workaholism

Low Self-Esteem is a thinking disorder based on the view the person has of himself as inadequate. Unless and until this basic view of self is altered a person cannot change the negative thinking that controls his reactions. This process is somewhat complicated and not a quick fix, not something a person can change just because she wants to do so.

Once low self-esteem is formed, the fear and anxiety that accompanies it affects everything a person does, says, and thinks.

Many who have LSE avoid seeking new jobs, initiating relationships, or learning new skills for fear of rejection or failure. Many avoid social settings and refrain from sharing their opinions for the same reasons. Some isolate, become people pleasers, and remain passive. Others get aggressive and cause havoc in their relationships. All people with LSE sabotage their lives to some degree.

Some become underachievers, achieving far less than they are capable of because they are paralyzed by fear. Others, driven to prove to themselves and others that they are adequate and deserving, become overachievers, probably becoming more successful than they would have if they didn't have low self-esteem. These overachievers often become workaholics, sometimes to the detriment of their families, creating relationship problems.

You can not necessarily tell that a person has low self-esteem because many who have LSE become experts at hiding their feelings and maintaining the appearance of control, even though this is not what they feel on the inside. In fact, many very successful people in high level careers actually suffer from low self-esteem, though only those close to them are aware of they have LSE.

When people with LSE do something they perceive as stupid or inappropriate, they instantly feel humiliated and suffer from "self-esteem attacks". At these moments they desperately want to run and hide, though this is often not possible. They may plummet into depression and devastation, episodes that may last minutes, hours, days, or even weeks. Afterwards they feel even more embarrassed to face the people who they think are aware of their problem.

The Impact of Low Self-Esteem In an Individual's Relationships

Relationships are greatly affected by low self-esteem. Those with low self-esteem tend to become either aggressive, passive, or passive-aggressive when threatened. They become defensive and argumentative or they withdraw and isolate, behaviors which do not contribute to healthy communication. Additionally, those with low self-esteem tend to be confused about who and when to trust and often make poor choices in partners. Intimacy becomes difficult to achieve and maintain due to these and other factors.

Preventing Low Self-Esteem In Children

Please feel free to contact Dr. Sorensen with any questions concerning low self-esteem, her books, and her recovery program.

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